Yesterday in Chicago the temperature reached a so-called “high” of 12 degrees, the US dollar reached lows it hasn’t hit in years, oil hit a record high and people are still dying in wars on foreign soil. And despite all that, my fellow Americans were still able to dig deep within their hearts and souls to find the will and the fortitude to go to the mall at 5 a.m.
Let us now give thanks and reflect on the true meaning of the holidays:
From The Onion A.V. Club: Tips for Surviving Office Holiday Parties
From The Onion A.V. Club: Holiday Event Mixlist
From Metal Heavy: Retrospective: Dead Winter Dead / Christmas Eve & Other Stories
And, in case you were wondering, I didn’t go to either of them. Some decisions are just too painful to make.